Monday, 23 September 2013

Worst Mommy of the Year goes to.....

I worked so hard to have the day planned perfectly!

I took off work the ENTIRE day! I was supposed to have it all down....I was supposed to be in control! And I'm never going to forgive myself!

This child is more than I ever deserved....and God gave me two!
Thursday evening was Lil Mister's school concert. Now, at his age he has a maximum of 5 minutes on stage and once they're off....they're done!



The concert takes place in the evening so the kids are tired and all the music and lights just over stimulates them. The teachers are amazing though and keeping things under control!

There was no school on Thursday because they wanted the children to rest for the concert. So....I took the day off too! We were going to have a lekker day together before Lil Misters big moment! I wanted the whole night to be about him!

I even arranged for C & L to babysit LJ for me that way it was just us with Lil Mister! I told them to be at my house at 6:30pm because the concert began at 7pm.

We went to a doctors appointment in the morning after some play time and then stopped by the shop for a chocolate! As we made our way home...both boys were asleep!

After a rest for the three of us....we began working in the garden and making beds! We were COVERED in mud but it was SO much fun....
Eventually however I noticed the time getting closer, so I dropped us all in a bath!

By 4:45 we were out the door so Lil Mister would be at the school by 5! I dropped him off with promises to see him again soon!

As LJ and I get home, I start dinner and get the cameras ready to go. Hubby Dearest comes home and eats and showers to head out while I wait on C & L. (Wait for it....my big fail is coming!)

Everything is going perfect! A friend of ours whose son is in Lil Misters class keeps calling wanting to know where we are! I figured he went to the school early to get some good seats because the concert was PACKED! I told him Hubby was on his way and I'd be there shortly!

I finally arrive 6:55....just in time. Or....so I thought. (And yes....3 days later...I'm crying as I write this!)

I hear music going and Lil Mister and his friend are running around. Hubby tells me that they're sitting with them on the side while waiting. After about 5 minutes something doesn't seem right. They started the concert early it seems. So I ask one of the teachers for Lil Mister what time do they go on stage.

She looks at me like I'm crazy and says they've already gone! Didn't I see it??

Yes, peeps, in one fell swoop my heart was broken.....possibly forever!
My son's first real performance and I missed it because apparently I was wrong about the time! The concert was to begin at 6...not 7! (Darn Afrikaans written notes from the school!)

I feel like the worst mommy in history. I didn't see his bright shining face dancing with joy. So many parents have told me how cute and adorable he was and that he was the only one from his class actually dancing.....and I wasn't there to see it.

Yes....we'll get a DVD but it isn't the same. And no, he doesn't realize we missed his part. He couldn't see us from the stage and when he came out of his classroom after performing...Papa was waiting on him. As far as he is aware....it was a great night!

But mommy.....mommy messed up big! I missed his moment because I'm too....too....hurried. I need to slow things down...read the papers thoroughly and have Hubby read the Afrikaans stuff. I need to know my times.

There is no excuse....My heart is broken. I will cry when I watch the DVD and tell him again and again how proud I am of him!

After the teacher said this.... I immediately had to walk away because I was crying. Lil Mister followed and gave me a huge hug and kiss. He tells me, 'Mama hart baie seer. Tou mah Mama, ek is lief vir jou. Moenie worry....die kar nie jou veer stomp!' (Mamas heart is very hurt. It's okay Mama, I love you. Don't worry....the car won't hit me again!)

Where the car came into, I don't know....but he was so concerned the whole night for my crying....he sat with me, shared his fries and gave lots of hugs and kisses!

For him....the night was amazing!

I promise you now, Lil Mister, this will NEVER happen again! Mommy will make sure I NEVER miss a moment of yours again! I sacrifice too much by working already to not be there when the times are set perfect! I will always be early, I will always be prepared....I will always see you! I thank you for your unfailing love for me! I don't deserve you, but God has blessed me! I will always love you my son!

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XOXxx

Shana Danae..

6 comments:

  1. Sometimes stuff happens even with our best laid plans. You tried so don't feel to bad. What a cute picture. I'm visiting from SSS Hop.
    I'm now your newest Bloglovin follower and cant wait to read more of your blog.
    Angel

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  2. Aw! I totally can see why you feel this way. I would probably feel the same if I missed my son too. He will have other things larger than this and more small moments that I hope you can forgive yourself and forget about this one thing. Hold your head high. You sound like such a wonderful Mams! Thank you for sharing with us at Mommy Mondy! xoxo

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  3. Yes, you're right....plans...I think they're my evil downfall! ;-) Thank you for the encouragement! I'm so glad you came by and can't wait to get to know you better!

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  4. That's so awesome that they planned a second birthday! I'm slowly getting over it and have to admit, feel a little relieved I'm not the only mom whose gone through this! Thank you so much for your uplifting words!

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  5. That is my goal...to make up for it by NEVER letting it happen again! From now on there will be reminders on the fridge, double checks with teachers, and alarms on the phone! I'm going postal about it!
    That is so amazing that you made it to every game of his! I'm sure that was more important that the ceremony anyways!

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  6. Thank you so much! You're right....bigger and better moments are still to come! I do my best and that is all I can do, I suppose! Thanks for stopping by!

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